In the end however, Jenna Petersen > Simon
“What the Duke Desires” by Jenna Petersen
A poem of apology to Jenna Petersen:
“Jenna Petersen, we love you, you rock
For an ARC you sent to us, instead of a smelly sock
Hugs and kisses have been sent your way
And we hope Sven finds you with a box of (his) unmentionables this Friday
We’re sorry we took so long to put up this post
A lot has been going on here, please don’t say we’re toast!
Our heads are hung with shame at this gaffe
Please don’t send a hitman to our offices on your behalf!”
In “What the Duke Desires” as with all of Jenna Petersen’s books, I find myself deeply depressed at the startling lack of a broodingly intense, gorgeously sculptured Alpha Male attending to me in real life. Incidentally I also find it harder and harder to resist the urge to cross out all references to the name of the heroine and insert instead, my own. And anyone who has read “What the Duke Desires” can see why for Simon Crathorne is beyond delicious and I am but a hapless starving girl who yearns for a hunk of burnin’ love. Tall, intelligent and incredibly charming, Simon’s wooing of Lillian made me want to tear my hair out and eat it. I loved from the get-go he seemed so utterly helpless against his desires towards Lillian and how he didn’t care very much to hide his stare. The only thing of course, that would make this story better would be if he had stared at ME. Yes Simon, stare at me while I sup. Stare at me while we walk through the gardens. Turn your lustful dark heated gaze upon my shiny hair! *takes up a pencil and crosses out “Lillian” on the page* I was never good at fighting urges.
To be honest however, but for the fact that Lillian has somehow snared the most eligible man in the whole of London, I kinda like her. She’s smart, she’s quick witted and she’s loyal to her family. Plus, she sucks at sports which being born without the gift of any semblence of hand-eye coordination and a deep personal dislike to perspiration, means she’s tops in my book. Unfortunately as she stands in the way of my Heart’s True Desire, I must, in principle, hate her. Surely you understand. For when Simon makes her an offer to be his mistress, then his lover, then takes her so passionately up on the billards table and then against the wall of his study, I first went to sit out in the cold for a bit with a bottle of vodka, then returned to scratch Lillian’s name out of most of the pages of the book. It’s rare to find an Alpha Male so …sensitive and yet manly at the same time and when Simon discovers that his father, whom he idolised is not all that he seems to be, my hands itched to comfort him in the only way I know how. Oh Simon. Let ME run my fingers through your hair and gaze upon your bronzed hairy chest. Let ME take off my clothes and have you stare at me like I am the most beautifully enchanting thing you have ever seen! *takes a swing from the vodka bottle* I swear, Jenna Petersen has a special talent for causing me to go off on an alcoholic bender of phenomenal degrees, only to ease the ache in my heart. Her heroes always seem so real. Like I could touch them. LET ME TOUCH YOOOU!!! SIMMOOOOOOOONNN
*Sheridan’s office door flings open to reveal Lola in her silk kimono* “I thought we had all agreed. No wailing after 10pm! You woke me up from the most delicious dream about Robert Pattinson. He was going to tell me how Kristin Stewart means nothing to him! What the hell are you going on about now?” shrieked Lola, charging forward.
“I’m reading Jenna Petersen’s latest book”
“Oh. *Lola lets out a gusty sigh* SIMON.”
“I know right?”
“Totally” replied Lola, letting out another gusty sigh. “So which part was your favourite?”
“You know, I really did enjoy the plot twist that Jenna pulled mid way through the book. I did not see that one coming! But still, my favouritest part of all, was when Simon deliberately lost that game of croquet just so he had an excuse to hit on Lillian some more. SIIGGH. Oh SIM-”
“He’s mine” Lola snapped tartly
“NO HE’S NOT!”
“Yes”
“NOOOOOOOOOO”
*Sheridan’s office door flings open again to reveal Mimi, her black silk eye-mask dangling between her fingers* ”No wailing after 10pm! Have you forgotten? We agreed like, yesterday!”
“Please put on some clothes Mimi” Lola calmly replied, shielding her eyes with her hands. “We were just debating to whom The Duke of Billingham belongs to. And I was merely informing Sheridan *Lola glances down at the floor where a rolling hissy fit is being conducted by Sheridan* that he is mine.”
“That’s impossible Lola. He’s mine”
“NOOOOOOOO” wailed Lola then stopping abruptly as Mimi starts swinging her trusty switchblade menacingly. “Where the hell did you keep that? No wait. I don’t want to know.”
Judy said,
November 5, 2009 @ 11:06 pm
Ok - now I have another book to add to my “gotta read it now” pile!
Sheridan Sakura Carlotta said,
November 6, 2009 @ 10:38 pm
Hi Judy, I think this one goes into the “drop everything and read it now!!” pile. Then feel free to come over so that we may chat about how depressed we are that we aren’t dating/married to Simon!
cutepolishgirl said,
November 7, 2009 @ 8:43 am
Just went and got it today- thanks for reminding me about this book.
Jenna Petersen said,
November 7, 2009 @ 8:55 am
Oh, you guys rock! Thank you so much for the great review!
And anyone who wants to keep up with my releases, you can always join up with my newsletter:
http://www.jennapetersen.com/newsletter/?p=subscribe&id=2
Landipan said,
November 9, 2009 @ 5:45 am
I always love to read your reviews they’re so much fun,I’ve already bought too many books because of this website^_^ and I can’t wait to read this one too!
Ms.petersen also writes steamy erotic romances under jess michaels,you should try ‘em out ^_~