Which luscious Lord of the Underworld is for you?
We just can’t get enough of the Lords of the Underworld here at RipMyBodice HQ and got to thinking, which of them we would want chained in our closet as our own personal plaything (our only regret being that we can’t accomodate all of them (it’s okay, renovation works are going on as we type)). After a lot of hair-pulling, screaming, coin tossing and epic chicken fight showdowns, we decided that the best way to settle this once and for all, would be by way of a RipMyBodice quiz. Remember ladies, no cheating!
Question 1: It’s movie night with you and your lucious Lord! While he runs to the kitchen to pop up an extra large bag of buttery popcorn with his hotness (by which we mean he stares at the kerneled bag with heavy lidded eyes (Paul Newman (God rest his soul) never had a chance!), he leaves you in charge of picking out the night’s entertainment to which you will be making out to. You stare at the impressive collection of DVDs in awe and ultimately reach for -
(A) Any of the Final Destination movies because you know your man just loves it when death wins.
(B) Kill Bill Vol. I (and maybe II) because all that violence really turns him on (which is great news for you!)
(C) 9 and 1/2 weeks (although you don’t manage to catch much of the movie seeing as how you’re too busy trying to re-enact certain scenes yourself with the help of some ice-cubes from the kitchen).
(D) Glitter
(E) Beyond a Reasonable Doubt
Question 2: For reasons unknown, the Greek Titans have got together with the Greek Gods to maroon you and your sexylovetoy on a deserted island (not knowing that this doesn’t quite constitute as punishment). Lucky for you, they are kind enough to grant you just enough time to grab one item (dirty sex toy paraphernalia does not count) to take with you. You automatically reach for:
(A) Your yoga mat so that you can keep your self limber and warmed up during those moments when he disappears.
(B) A lifesized punching bag/voodoo doll with its accompanying set of sharp pins and garrote wire for your man to vent all his energies on (when he’s not expending them on and with you that is (these times would include, for example, toilet breaks)). Of course this lifesized punching bag/voodoo doll would be made of indestructible foam so it’ll remain impervious to any punches, kicks and/or coconuts thrown at it.
(C) An illustrative, unabridge, director’s cut version of the Karma Sutra. The multitude of positions, techniques and forms should keep you and Mister Sweetcheeks entertained for hours (though it is possible that you may, after having finally escaped the island, never be able to walk again).
(D) Paracetamol and/or copious amounts of numbing cream.
(E) A magic 8 ball. Useful for when you have to make important decisions (trust us, your man won’t be of much help) like - Does this banana leaf bikini make my butt look fat? Isn’t it my turn to be on top? Hey!! Is that club med over that hill?
Question 3: Of the many many things you have in common (one of which of course is your mutual agreement that the true path to happiness is by way of shopping through the use of his limitless credit card) is your agreed love of the late, great Michael Jackson. Where you differ however, is your favourite all-time Michael Jackson song. While you vehemently maintain that to choose a favourite is considered sacrilege, his favourite is:
(A) Blood on the Dance Floor
(B) Beat It
(C) Billie Jean
(D) Unbreakable
(E) Black or White
Question 4: Everyone needs a little break now and again (even mighty recappers of shiny hair and pickled livers). You and your lord decide to go on a romantic date, just the two of you (and your black lace thong). Because you’re way too busy gloating around the office to make any actual plans, your darling sugarplum decides to take the lead on this one and plans the ultimate date. He takes you to:
(A) A quiet, secluded, romantic, moonlit picnic complete with candlelight, rose petals, champagne and the crooning of Michael Bublé (courtesy of his Ipod speakers). Location? The town cemetery.
(B) An illegal unsanctioned no holds barred fight-to-the-death cage match featuring metal chairs, brass knuckles and maybe some hungry dogs.
(C) A non-descript two storey house in a quiet little cul de sac in the suburbs where you find out that a neighbourhood swingers’ party is in full progress and the theme for the night is “Debauchery, Lust and Inappropriate Behaviour by Middle Aged Men and Cougars. Hide the Children!”
(D) An exclusive S&M club where he has booked a private (as private as can be with a glass window and an audience that is) room for the two of you, complete with the latest merchandise from the adult sex store around the corner
(E) A black-tie high rollers roulette tournament in Las Vegas where your man puts his talents to good use by confounding the competition (and unfortunately you in the process).
Julie Bo Boolie said,
September 21, 2009 @ 8:34 pm
Maddox is mine.
cutepolishgirl said,
September 22, 2009 @ 6:23 am
I call Paris!
Anida Adler said,
September 22, 2009 @ 5:25 pm
Oh, man, I have the grim reaper. Is that a scythe in your pocket…?
Bernadette said,
September 23, 2009 @ 8:07 am
Paris! Paris! He’s my man! He can do what no man can!!!
Kimberly said,
September 25, 2009 @ 12:22 am
I happily call Sabin!!!
Woo Hoo!!
Brandy W said,
September 25, 2009 @ 11:01 pm
Damn it I got 2 - A’s, 2 - B’s and an E. Can I have them all or just take Aeron?
Serena said,
September 30, 2009 @ 5:17 am
I <3 Lucien
LadyCurvyA.K.APHR said,
November 6, 2009 @ 3:18 am
C … well … good!! :/