September 30, 2009
· Written by Sheridan Sakura Carlotta
· Filed under Proposed Titles, RIPMYBODICE GOODIES
Date: 1 September 2009
To: ladies@ripmybodice.com
From: buddingeditorwriter@hotromance.com
Subject: Need assistance
Dear RipMyBodice Girls,
Firstly, I have to say that I totally love you guys! How you manage to write such great reviews, keep up with the latest fashion, and not end up in the state penitentiary for drunk and disorderly conduct I will never know but if you can help me with this, you’d totally be my heroes! I work in the Romance writing industry and every month or so we’re asked to pitch ideas for potential Romance novels in 30 words or less. It’s got to be snappy, with a title that’ll just grab you by the hair and lure you to buy the book. Do you guys have any ideas?
Hopeful,
Miss Stressed Out.
PS: Do you think you could loan out Juan and Sven to me for a weekend or so? I’ve got some muscles I’d like them to work on.
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September 25, 2009
· Written by Sheridan Sakura Carlotta
· Filed under CONTEMPORARY, Lynne Graham
“The Italian Billionaire’s Pregnant Bride” by Lynne Graham
Sheridan watched as Lola ran her fingers up and down the Romance section of the bookstore, and smiled tentatively at the Pale Scary Lady who looked less than impressed by Lola’s fondling of the books. “Lola can we go now? I think Pale Scary Lady is about thisclose to sneaking up on us and then garrote us with a length of brown packing string” whispered Sheridan, nervously waving at the Pale Scary Lady who had now narrowed her eyes at Lola’s attempt at molding herself against the M to P shelf. “But I haven’t found anything yet!” protested Lola. Ignoring Mimi’s shouts of “I have!” from across the the Murder, Mystery, Supernatural aisle, Lola turned to Sheridan who held a pile of Harlequinn Romance books and picked up the first book in the pile.
“Hmm. “The Italian Billionaire’s Pregnant Bride”" read Mimi out loud from behind Lola’s shoulder. “Ooooh. What do you suppose the book is about?”
“Well Mi, probably about an intergalatic half man half snake warrior who comes to planet earth in search of a bride and ends up marrying and eloping with Harry Potter because he speak parseltongue” mused Sheridan, making her way to the counter.
“OOH!” exclaimed Mimi, looking at Sheridan with uncontained excitement.
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September 21, 2009
· Written by Sheridan Sakura Carlotta
· Filed under Quizzes, RIPMYBODICE GOODIES
We just can’t get enough of the Lords of the Underworld here at RipMyBodice HQ and got to thinking, which of them we would want chained in our closet as our own personal plaything (our only regret being that we can’t accomodate all of them (it’s okay, renovation works are going on as we type)). After a lot of hair-pulling, screaming, coin tossing and epic chicken fight showdowns, we decided that the best way to settle this once and for all, would be by way of a RipMyBodice quiz. Remember ladies, no cheating!
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September 18, 2009
· Written by La Lola
· Filed under Lorelei James, WESTERNS
“Tied Up Tied Down” by Lorelei James
In “Tied Up Tied Down”, you have Kade McKay, who is the best kind of cowboy hero. He’s sweet, charming, polite to women, loves kids, is deliciously sexy and aggressive enough to go after the woman he wants and keep her (tied down, if he has to). Somebody please tell me, when is the next flight out to Wyoming?
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September 15, 2009
· Written by Sheridan Sakura Carlotta
· Filed under Gena Showalter, PARANORMAL
“Heart of the Dragon” by Gena Showalter
(An RMB re-interpretation of “Gaston” from Walt Disney’s Beauty and The Beast (why yes, we don’t have anything else better to do, thanks for asking))
Sheridan: Who does she think she is? That girl Grace has tangled with the wrong man! No one (but me) has claims to Darius!
La Lola: Heh Heh. Darn right.
Sheridan: He’s hot! So hot! But it’s Grace he loves! Why, it’s more than I can bear!
La Lola: More beer?
Sheridan: What for? Nothing helps. I’m depressed.
La Lola: Who you? Never! Sheridan you’ve got to pull yourself together. *Lola suddenly looks up, startled, as Sheridan has climbed up on her desk and is preparing to sing a love ballad to Darius*
Sheridan: *ahem*
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September 12, 2009
· Written by La Lola
· Filed under Elizabeth Vaughan, PARANORMAL
“White Star” by Elizabeth Vaughan
After 0.01 seconds: Am in great pain. Falling asleep by the pool when mercury’s ready to pop out of the thermometer is not a good idea. Apparently when the girl at the IPL hair removal salon tells you to stay out of the sun for 24 hours, she is not lying. Arms now look as if I have been sprayed by a radioactive chemical agent. Not exactly the look I was going for. Will try and console myself with reading “White Star” by E. Vaughan. Pick up book.
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September 9, 2009
· Written by Sheridan Sakura Carlotta
· Filed under HISTORICAL, Susan Wiggs
“The Charm School” by Susan Wiggs
If you think this book features an actual school you’d be wrong
Cos it’s about an ugly duckling who yearned to belong
“Isador” is the heroine’s name
And this is a story about how she played the love game
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September 3, 2009
· Written by Sheridan Sakura Carlotta
· Filed under PARANORMAL, Shelly Laurenston
“Here Kitty, Kitty” by Shelly Laurenston
Dear Lola, Mimi, Juan and Sven,
If you’re reading this, I am probably on the next flight out to South Carolina in the US of A (and if I am unable to convince Mister Airline Ticket Man to let me purchase a ticket with all my worldly savings ($46.82), then I guess I should be back in time for dinner so save me a plate ok?). You see my friends, I am on a mission to find Nikolai Vorislav, the gorgeous shape shifting tiger with a Southern accent, deep pockets, hot body and crazy ass sex drive. Though I am different from the heroine (being that my lady bits do not emit thumping noises - audible to my own ears at least), I am pretty sure I will be able to turn Nik around in his obsession over Angelina to me. I think. No no, I’m sure of it and you know why??
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