A Greek God
“The Greek’s Christmas Baby” by Lucy Monroe
The Greek’s Christmas Baby. I could change the title to “The Amnesiac Greek Tycoon’s Secret Christmas Baby with His Mistress Turned Wife” and that’s the book summed up right there, populated with all the elements of the good people at Harlequin.
And yet, this book was so much more! I spent half my time screaming into a pillow because I was so aggravated with Aristide Kouros, abovementioned wealthy millionaire with an unfortunate memory loss and soon to be father of a baby conceived at Christmas. And the other half of the time wanting to rub him in butter and grill him, he was that hott. Kebab me Aristide!
In case you didn’t already gather from that highly informative title, Aristide the wealthy corporate tycoon and his pregnant wife Eden are in a car accident after she announces that she wants a divorce. You gotta love a guy who sees the oncoming truck and reaches his arm across his wife in an attempt to shield her. Awwww…. Câ’mon Aristide, I fell off my bicycle and it really hurts! Kiss and make it better! Lower… lower… there’s the spot! Ahem. *clears throat and twiddles thumbs at the sound of highly scandalised crickets chirping* Eden awakes and is relieved to discover that baby Kouros is alive and taking up space in her womb still. But poor Aristide. Poor bastardly Aristide. Poor bastardly delicious man candy Aristide. I remain conflicted.
He wakes up and remembers everyone except Eden, which of course shoots an arrow into her heart. Instead, he chooses to believe Kassandra, who, because I am a LAY-DEE, will politely refer to as Aristide’s conniving bitch whore of a personal assistant. She poisons his mind against Eden and convinces him that he never loved his wife. My blood pressure will never be the same again. All of that Evil Demoness’s attempts to fool Aristide succeed. OK, I know the guy was in a horrific car crash and had selective amnesia, but still! My poor heart is still palpitating from the aggravation. Rest assured, when I am married to my 32 year old billionaire industrialist who has a full head of hair, a face so beautiful that angels weep in shame and rock hard buns, his personal assistant will be a dwarf with body odour named Enrico. You can take that to the bank hunny.
And when Aristide makes Eden sit in the backseat of the car (saw that one coming a mile away) and Demon Hell Spawn gets to sit in the front seat of the Jaguar, I was hoping that another truck would come along and conveniently take out the front seat of the car.
When Aristide decides that he won’t sleep in the same bedroom as Eden, her disbelief and anguish are heartbreaking to read about. I too would react the same way as Eden, because who would want to be apart from the chiselled body of a Greek god, with abs that can be used to serve a cheese platter on? It’s been a long cold winter my darling, come a little bit closer and let us partake in bodily heat! What do you mean it would be wrong to snuggle if you don’t remember me? Remember this? *wags dagger at him* Thought so! Thatta boy! *pats bed next to La Lola* Closer now!
Growly possessive Aristide is alpha malehood at its finest. He and Eden are at a fundraiser and he’s not happy when Giuseppe, an Italian stallion tries to hit on Eden. Aristide’s all “Stay away from my woman! Rowr! Watch out or I’ll fry your Italian meatballs! If you didn’t hear me the first time, I’ll rowr it again! Rowr!!” and La Lola’s doing a happy dance because the only thing I like more than The Grovel is The Possession. Slap me on a hamburger bun and smother me in cheese, I’m done. But then Aristide has to go and run after his secretary and apologise for hurting her feelings. Somewhere in Hong Kong, a little old man is raising his head and looking up at the sound of thunder. Sorry Mr Wong, it’s only the blood-curdling scream of an engagingly dressed and well-coiffed girl who’s had her emotions yo-yo like Elizabeth Taylor’s weight. *points to blonde highlights* See? Not a hair out of place!
Then Aristide regains his memory, and is determined to win back Eden’s affections. He sacks The Villainous Hydra Who Probably Wears Tacky Shoes and buys a multitude of pressies for Eden. Hey, works for me! He buys Eden a diamond anniversary band (I mean, the ring’s made of diamonds and not that they’re celebrating their diamond anniversary coz that would make them like, 400), masses of roses to symbolise his eternal devotion and a private jet for her personal use. And by that, I don’t mean a jet ski. Ooh la la! I believe someone has just topped Matthew Farrell in the “Gorgeous Gift-Giving Gods†list. Whoever said to beware Greeks bearing gifts had no freaking clue what he was talking about. And when it’s a hunky piece of man love turning all Santa Claus? Your heart must surely be as hard and cold as the Pantheon if you can resist Aristide. Oh Aristide, rest assured your Elgin Marbles will be safe in my hands. Make that your Elgin Golfballs. Very safe.
Hmmm… quite a lot of emotional intensity packed into this little book. Methinks I’ll be hunting down more of Lucy Monroe’s HQs. Having had some Greek, I think I fancy a bit of Italian…
gracieclay said,
February 23, 2008 @ 3:28 am
I have to rec 3 Brides for 3 Brothers, just finished it and I absolutely loved the first two stories! It’s on sale now so it should be pretty easy to find. I really like her HQ’s, I’ve collected all of them I believe and haven’t really been disappointed in any of them.
Wendy said,
February 23, 2008 @ 4:31 am
Yeah, I like how she manages to get the emotional intensity without quite as big a heapin’ helping of the stupid as your usual HP.
lauren said,
February 23, 2008 @ 5:43 am
Have you read the first book, with his brother? Even worse name, I think The Greek’s Inoicent Virgin, but it could be more intense and very good.
The only one of her HP’s that so far I didn’t like was the second in her Royal trilogy, I just felt that the h/H had the same argument over and over and over again.
La Lola said,
February 25, 2008 @ 4:27 pm
Hey gracieclay I went to her website and checked out the trailer for 3 Brides for 3 Brothers. Looks like a hoot, but I shall try it based on your rec!
I hought I had it but then realised it was The Italian’s Innocent Virgin or The Greek’s Innocent Mistress or somesuch name like that.
Hi Wendy and Lauren: I haven’t been able to find the Greek’s Innocent Virgin!
lauren said,
February 25, 2008 @ 11:16 pm
Yeah, many of her books have similarly bad names.
Lady L said,
June 1, 2008 @ 4:39 am
I don’t think the bad names are her fault maybe is a harlequin thing cause I’ve read every book by her that I’ve been able to put my hands on and the others, her historicals and contemporaries wich aren’t harlequin don’t have such bad names.
Anyhoo regardless of the “bad names” that they do have cause I’m not saying that they don’t, Lucy Monroes writes very good stories.
Like the series Ready Willing and Able, my God, three yummy mercenaries who are like very BDBish. BTW if any of you girls reads this series I’m calling dibbs on Wolf so stear clear from him!
Lady L said,
June 1, 2008 @ 4:40 am
And what I liked about this book is that the bitch got slaped wich doesn’t always happen, and our Greek God wasn’t stupid for long, only some chapters.
La Lola said,
June 1, 2008 @ 1:46 pm
“Like the series Ready Willing and Able, my God, three yummy mercenaries who are like very BDBish.”
Girls, to the RMB mobile!
Pixelinchen said,
April 11, 2010 @ 5:06 pm
Oh, come on. I really didn’t like the book. Eden is a timid shy mouse, who only waits for HIM to do something. I also didn’t like Kassandra, she’s a bitch, but I have to admit, she is the one who could be one of my girl friends: She’s a working girl, ambitious and she ACTS in contrast to our timid little mouse. Eden is completely passive and the only thing she manages is getting pregnant. Sorry, but I can’t share your delight about the book.