Make mine a triple decker club sandwich with extra mayo
“Standing in the Shadows” by Shannon McKenna
Connor. Connor, Connor, Connor. Why do you do this to me? Why? You know I am in love with your friend Seth Mackey from “Behind Closed Doors“, and yet you persist in making me question my feelings for him, and make me look like a lusty, hoparound rabbit who flits from one berry patch to the next! Why, Connor? Why do you insist on tempting me with your berries?? But do not fret, I am sure yours are big berries. VERY big berries. Nay, make that frolicking in your cantaloupe patch.
Oh Connor, you are the epitome of manliness. The quintessential bad boy. The pinnacle of what every man cannot even imagine attaining. Brad Pitt cries himself to sleep at night because he is not you. You are good with your hands, having been brought up by your crazed survivalist dad to be able to survive a nuclear war. You are compassionate and thoughtful, even to all those who scorn you for being psychotic and overly aggressive (death to them all!) You are good with your hands, being the oversexed and alpha lover that you are. (And as all other Shannon McKenna heroes seem to be, God bless her). Put those hands on me Connor!
When I read about how you’ve been in love for Erin Riggs for years, I want to deed poll my name and change it to Erin Riggs. Or better yet, love ME Connor. I would never blame you for turning in my traitor-cuckoo father. How could I even accept a father who was in the FBI with you, and yet turned on you and caused you to be in a coma for a year! And yet, with your infinite wisdom, patience, and cute tushy, you forgave her Connor.
And you are remarkably well-adjusted for someone who has gone through so much! You’ve had a rotten childhood (see abovementioned survivalist father and mother who died tragically in childbirth), been blown out of a ship, been in a coma, been shot at, and in the end your lady love thinks you are a homicidal maniac! The travesty. You see, I’d be a much better match for you Connor. My idea of elemental survival is going without eye cream. I have the constitution of a horse, and so will never die in childbirth (although the scene where you’re trying to recapture the maternal love you never had, by suckling at Erin’s boob is fairly eyebrow-raising to say the least).
You are so concerned and protective and jealous and macho and broody and sexy and intelligent and funny and well-endowed. With humour, I mean well-endowed with humour! La Lola just wants to rub Lurpak butter all over you and gobble you up! Who wouldn’t want a man who gets crazy possessive when he thinks I’m in danger and will stop at nothing to keep me safe? When you thought that Erin (aka The Tart Who Does Not Deserve You) was being hunted by this crazed James Bond villain-esque Novak, you were right by her side making sure that she came to no harm.
And how you were in love with her for yonks, ever since she was 17, but you wanted to give her time to grow up because you thought it wouldn’t be fair for her to be involved in such an intense relationship?? *La Lola weeps with the pain you must have gone through* And that scene where she had gone to the house of Novak (who was in disguise and so she didn’t recognize him) and wore the clothes that the twit provided to her, and you found out? *bliss* That scene. I had to fill my bathtub with ice cubes and immerse myself in it, because Connor McCloud as a lean, angry wolf filled with a jealous rage and determined to exert control over Erin, is almost too much to bear. I said almost, because La Lola was left in a little whimpering puddle on the floor.
And Connor. Your brothers! Davy and Sean! Davy as the strong, silent brother who’s an amazing cook and he’s the eldest brother, so you know that means he’s the take-charge sort! And Sean as the golden boy, the lady-killer, the designer tog wearing stud. Let’s all be in a sandwich. All four of us! La Lola will be on the bottom, Connor you get to be on top, and Davy and Sean on either side of me. *squeeal* I swear to God, I would die a happy woman, as we frolicked together like a litter of naughty puppies.
Davy, you’re up next, and you’re mine!
Wendy said,
August 21, 2007 @ 3:18 am
Yi!
Wendy said,
August 21, 2007 @ 3:21 am
[returns to site, sobbing quietly because the library has no Shanna McKenna book ]
La Lola said,
August 21, 2007 @ 9:09 am
There there. *pats Wendy consolingly on the shoulder*
Bedelia said,
August 21, 2007 @ 2:41 pm
Jeez, I need to take my own advice and read these books again! (For like the 15th time.) Wish I could read them again for the first time.
La Lola said,
August 21, 2007 @ 4:46 pm
Everyone’s recommended such great books to us. And I know that SSC’s insane over Kresley Cole at the moment. So bring on the recommendations people!
Sheridan Sakura Carlotta said,
August 21, 2007 @ 6:17 pm
Hey Bedelia! I completely understand what you mean. Sometimes I wish I had never read “Paradise” or “Perfect”, or any of the greats…just so I have the intense pleasure of reading them for the very first time! There’s a little something something that’s lost after you re-read a book. *tears*
Lisa Marie Rice said,
September 3, 2007 @ 4:42 pm
I’m feeling so SMUG!!! Because I’ve read Shannon McKenna’s latest, Nick Ward’s story, and it is GREAT!! There are no superlatives that suffice. it is fantastic, possibly the best thing she’s ever written, and that’s saying something. I am her critique partner so I’m the lucky one who gets to read everything first, even before the editor.
And the book (untitled) is fabulous.
and that’s all I’m saying. (smugly zipping lips shut)
Lisa Marie Rice
Sheridan Sakura Carlotta said,
September 3, 2007 @ 4:44 pm
We are MOST jealous. We wish to know how your affections (in the form of a softcopy of said book) may be bought. Just name your price. If necessary, we will each sell 1 kidney and half a liver (the good half).
La Lola said,
September 3, 2007 @ 4:59 pm
Not to mention any soft copies of any books which you have written, Lisa Marie, and would like our candid thoughts on. Firstborns and our hair can be provided. (We have very nice hair.)
Ma'mselle Mimi said,
September 3, 2007 @ 5:14 pm
Well, since we’re trading body parts.. I have a collection of skulls. If that helps.
*awkward silence*
They make good penholders?
Angielicious said,
May 5, 2008 @ 3:58 am
La Lola you were oh so right (as usual) about Connor - OMG!!! What a manly beast - the only thing that was missing was a little spanking during the “I can’t believe you’re wearing the clothes & lingerie another man bought for you!” scene. I think I’ll keep reading that portion over and over and over . . . .
I am LOVIN’ the McCloud series - onto Davy’s story!!!
La Lola said,
May 5, 2008 @ 10:55 am
Hey Angielicious, glad you liked it! There will always be a bit of Connor in me. (Or a lot, take your pick). But Davy’s book is sadly not as good and neither is Sean’s I think. But things are looking up again with Nick’s book!
Chanel19 said,
February 22, 2009 @ 5:35 am
Hell, late to the party as usual
But to quible: It was an etopic pregnancy NOT childbirth. So he really must have been deathly afraid of setting those swimmers loose…