I’ll give you my love, an eternal love
“Paradise” by Ms. Judith McNaught
Dear Ms. McNaught,
I know it has been a while since I last wrote to you (although I do speak to you/your shrine daily) and I hope this letter finds you well. Dearest Ms. Mc…can I call you Judith? Judith, this is what I’ve been wanting to say for a long time now and due to the recent turn of horrific and surprising events (aka the release of “Die Hard”) I can keep silent no longer. You have ruined me Judith. You have ruined me for life. Make no mistake, my love for you still burns strong (subject to you of course, never writing another Romance Murder Mystery Thriller) but Judith, because of you, because of “Paradise”, I will never truly love another as much as I love Matthew. It is a condition in my will (by where I also bequeath all my glitter crayons equally to Mimi and Lola) that my tombstone reads “Here lies Sheridan Sakura Carlotta, imaginary loyal wife and lover of Matthew Farrell of “Paradise”". And now, thanks to “Die Hard 4.0″, I will forever see the face of Justin Long whenever Matthew’s name is uttered to me.
It is because of you Judith, that I spend my life searching for a genius steel-mill worker/mechanic from Indiana who will be going or has gone to South America to work for a while and who either will be coming back from South America to become the billion dollar dynamic corporate raider he was born to be (despite growing up on the wrong side of town with an alcoholic father) or is already one. It is because of you, that I sometimes catch a flight to the windy city to amble along the sidewalks of the financial district, hoping to bump into Matthew. Because of you, I never strayed too far from the sidewalk; because of you I always played on the same side so I don’t get hurt. Because of you I spent my 18th birthday curled up in a ball crying, because unlike Meredith Bancroft (the lucky bitch) I did not meet an incredibly handsome young man at a ball whose borrowed tuxedo was too small for him but who yet wore it with such disdain and pride, who then teased me and smiled lovingly into my eyes before kssing me in the gardens when the fireworks started. Neither did said man drive me home in the Porsche my over-protective, over-bearing daddy bought for me (because I was obviously too emotionally overwrought to drive) where we then had sex on my couch, effectively impregnating me and thereby chaining me to him forever.
No one understands my pain. I have longed to turn my back on my family upon learning I was bearing the child of Matthew, to marry him, and then to live on the other side of town with him and his now no longer alcoholic daddy and his scarily genius sister, where we would play monopoly. Matthew would win of course, he always does. You have no idea Judith, how the simple game of monopoly has for me, become the benchmark of a suitable man. You suck at monopoly? You ain’t gonna get laid. That’s my motto. At night, Matthew would then make love to me with the same intensity as he did post the ball that night on the couch and during the day, when my man would be at work, I would wait around the house for him…perhaps I may cook him a meal or two (because unlike Meredith, I actually can cook. Yes I am of many talents), perhaps even “knit” him a sweater (by which, like Meredith, I mean I would go out and buy him one and pretend that I knitted it). Then to cheer me up (for I would have severed all ties with my family for him), he would none so surreptitiously burn a bunch of dead leaves on the bonfire he started to keep me warm, so that the air would smell like autumn, because I had earlier mentioned that autumn was my favorite season. *sniffle*
Why Judith? Why did you have to go write “Paradise”? Why did the producers/script writers of “Die Hard 4.0″ have to torment me so?! Justin Long??? I mean, fine whatever he was hysterical in “Dodgeball” (”dodge, duck, dip, dive and dodge!”) but come on. The name Matthew Farrell is SACRED. It belongs only to the stunningly good looking man who crawled his way out of the wrong side of town and made something of himself and even though he now wears expensive suits, inside, my man is a fighter. Only for him would I even consider going through The Big Misunderstanding that Meredith went through; stolen letters, miscommunication, a miscarriage, a telegram notification of divorce. For Matthew, I would go through it all! Even the 11 year separation! I would even date wimpy Parker for howsoever long if it meant that one day, I would be able to sit across from Matthew in this cosy little restaurant and tell him that the dodgy lawyer my father had hired wasn’t actually a practicing member of the American Bar and therefore we are still married. Surprise! Take me now!!
Except of course, Meredith for some interplanetary reason still wants Parker (her childhood friend and long term boyfriend now turned loser wimpy banker fiancee). Whatever. She may be rich, cultured, she may own a chain of departmental stores (again, lucky bitch), unfortunately she isn’t too bright. I’m bright Matthew! I’m bright!! And like Meredith, I too would drive through the snow (upon learning that instead of leaving me to suffer in the hospital post the miscarriage like I thought he did, Matthew had actually flown back Stateside to come visit me in the hospital and only a threat of a restraining order prevented Matthew from coming to see me) to clear up The Big Misunderstanding. OH JUDITH! The scene, THAT scene where Matthew holds Meredith when she tells him that she did not abort his baby! And when he tenderly holds her, himself crying the manly tears of what might have been, the knowledge that what they had was real! *wails* oh MAAAATTHEEEEEEWWWW!!!!
Again! You have ruined me for life! Long have I searched for a man who would woo me with the same unrelenting passion, disarming charm, and steely focus; whispering tenderly to me that if I went to bed with him, he would give me the world. If I moved in with him, he’ll give me paradise on a gold platter. Anything I want, everything I want. He would come with it of course; since it’s a package deal. *wails while thrashing on the floor* You have imprisoned me in a Matthew Farrell-less castle Judith and the only respite I have is to drink myself into a coma. How cruel you are to give me a glimpse of a man who despite being able to have any (and I do mean ANY) woman in the world, all he wants, is the love of one woman, to the point where he obsesses about whether to keep the draperies in his impressive meeting room open/closed to impress her. A man who would say very harshly to me “I’ve wanted you everyday of my godforsaken life”; dispelling any insecurities I might have about his desire for me.
You wound me Judith, yet you are the healing balm to my soul for introducing me to Matthew. You bring darkness to my life, and yet, there is light. Perhaps you might want to consider bringing legal action against anyone who misuses the sacred name of “Matthew Farrell” and only allow very very good looking men access. I know people who know people Judith, I can make it happen for you. Also, please. If you have based your character of Matthew on anybody (I know sometimes writers actually write about the people they know in the guise of a character), tell me. I will hunt him down like Lola hunts down krispy kremes. Until then Judith, I will be here, drinking myself to an early grave (where I will be buried with my tattered copy of “Paradise”), a prisoner in the tower of my everlasting eternal love for Matthew Farrell, accompanied only by Lola and Mimi, each with their own psychotic issues, visited only by our therapist, and attended by Juan and Sven. *sniffle*
All my love is reserved always and forever only for Matthew Farrell,
Sheridan Sakura Carlotta-Farrell.
La Lola said,
July 19, 2007 @ 4:09 pm
*snort* Justin Long as Matthew Farrell. The gods wept.
Hael said,
July 22, 2007 @ 12:49 pm
Isn’t Matt a darling? Matthew is my favorite hero of all heroes that I have read! lol.
Awww.. ♥ ♥
monette said,
July 24, 2007 @ 3:35 pm
Uggghhh… I feel the same way… I just came accross your blog coz I was actually google-ing Matt Farrell… that’s how obsessed I am with him… ;-P
I just love him…
Sheridan Sakura Carlotta said,
July 24, 2007 @ 8:27 pm
Hi Hael and monette! There are no words to describe my deep deep love for Matthew Farrell. I have read a lot (and I do mean “a lot”) of Romance novels since I was a wee lass and no one has ever come close to my icy heart the way Matt does.
Also, monette, there is no shame in the googling of Matthew(since I do it on a regular basis as well (why i’m not too sure)). Hope you like our blog!
Karen S said,
March 16, 2008 @ 9:41 am
Is this not THE most amazing book? I cried when she told Matt about losing the baby…and the flowers and oh…my heart broke for her, them.
I have read thos book I don’t know how many times. I have recently started searching for this book online…I want my own hardback, large print…and it’s selling right now for $156+. That just shows you how WONDERFUL this book is and how in demand it is.
Sheridan Sakura Carlotta said,
March 17, 2008 @ 8:51 am
I would pay any price for Paradise (Hur hur hur). No but seriously. You should get the book! It’s a collector’s item and my own personal tattered dog eared tear drenched copy of Paradise will be buried with me when I die. Along with all my shoes.
Sayuri said,
June 24, 2008 @ 5:12 am
Man, I can’t wait to read this now.
dlamb8 said,
June 24, 2008 @ 9:47 pm
i started this book two days ago & have had to force myself to put it down. you know, to do things like sleep - or go to work - or make dinner for the kids. (it’s so funny how they like to eat!) it is incredible! my kleenex box has gotten quite a work out already & i’ve still got about 100 pages to go. another great review on yet another great book. rock on ladies!
Sayuri said,
June 25, 2008 @ 12:30 am
I. LOVED. THIS.
Srsly, If I could I would marry this book right now. I hope you’re ready for the SMACKDOWN Sheridan, honey, cause I am here to tell you, Matt Farrell, he is mine…..all mine.
Guh the whole book was just…*sigh* perfect. Matt is just perfect….and HAWT. The way he reacted when Meridith told him she loved him. Off. the. chart.
I just…this book left me a little speechless. All I can think is ‘I WANT….’ Muh.
I’m applying for the position of High Preistess in the Church of McNaught. I’m so certainly not worthy.
Reading Perfect next.
Sheridan Sakura Carlotta said,
June 25, 2008 @ 10:43 pm
BRING. IT. ON. *pulls on glittery spandex tights and cracks knuckles* I will defend MY Matthew Farrell until my dying day. Seriously though, I’ve read many Romance novels in my life and no book nor Alpha Hero comes close to the way I feel about “Paradise” and Matthew. I’m glad you loved the book Sayuri! I’m sure you’ll love “Perfect” as well. PS - make sure you have a box of kleenex with you!!
Sheridan Sakura Carlotta said,
June 25, 2008 @ 10:45 pm
dlamb8, welcome to our website! *throws the usual party confetti and hands out the welcome drinks* I hope you’ve managed to finish the book since your last post! Never mind about the children girl, I’m sure they can survive on a loaf of bread for a day or so ;). PS - we should all buy stock in Kleenex. We’d make a fortune everytime JM releases another book.
dlamb8 said,
June 26, 2008 @ 5:05 am
i did finish the book late last night. what can i say that has not already been said? it was awesome. now i fear that the next book i pick up to read - no matter what it is - will seem to totally suck in comparison. but, it is a chance i must take. i’m thinking i’ll have to switch to something completely different. i just picked up “fantasy lover” by sherrilyn kenyon’s dark hunter series. so, we’ll see how that goes.
ttfn!
Sheridan Sakura Carlotta said,
June 26, 2008 @ 8:15 pm
Girl, I know the feeling. Let me tell you now, that in my experience, nothing is quite as good as Paradise, and nothing is quite as spectacular as reading Paradise for the first time. Tis a momentuous moment in history.
Hey I’m reading Sherrilyn Kenyon meself! *hi5*! But it’s a contemp called “Bad Attitude” and not her paranormal. Let me know how “fantasy lover” is!
dlamb8 said,
July 3, 2008 @ 10:21 pm
“fantasy lover” was a good one. yet another series that i will be obsessed with!