“Cowgirl Up and Ride” by Lorelei James
Sheridan came tottering into the RMB office, arms laden with bags of Japanese take-out. “Lo, I’m back! It’s just us lunching in today, because Mimi muttered something about tracking down some Charles Manson memorabilia, so she’s AWOL for the next 2 days. So here’s your tonkatsu-don and…. Holy cow!” Sheridan stopped short at the sight of a cut-out cow wearing a diamond tiara. “Um, Lola? Why are there bales of hay and inflatable cactuses all over the place?”
Read the rest of this entry »

“Long Hard Ride” by Lorelei James
You are cordially invited to Ripmybodice’s annual summer fundraiser in aid of Ladies Who Love Louboutins But Lack Liquidity. To urge you to donate generously to this worthy and extremely self-serving cause, we have planned a spectacular and elegantly tasteful gala, entitled: Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy.
Read the rest of this entry »

The RMB girls gather around their large crystal punch bowl filled to the brim with all the different flavours of Absolut vodka, in their Vic’s Secret PINK PJs, chanting:

“Double double toil and trouble,
Spam bots make our blood bubble.
Round about the punch bowl go
In the pink bath bombs throw.

Scale of fish, an old wisdom tooth
An out of season shoe, and a piece of an old booth.
O Romance Gods hear our cries
And of these spam bots whom we deeply despise.
Throw them into a pit so deep
That into our website, their comments no longer creep.
Read the rest of this entry »

“Running Wild” by Sarah McCarty

A ballad of three wolven brothers by Troubaudor Lola and Minstrel Sheridan - Part III (Wyatt’s Story)

I

Now twere the tale of the third wolven brethren
A tale we have saved for laste
For Wyatt the alpha of the werewolves,
Will break his lover’s sexual faste
Looking e’er at his cousins, his loyal lieutenants at his side
Having founde luve both of them, he could not help but sigh
“O where is my lady love, wherefore doth she tarry,
When I long to hold her in mine arms, and in a feather bed be merry.”
Read the rest of this entry »

“Running Wild” by Sarah McCarty

A ballad of three wolven brothers by Troubaudor Lola and Minstrel Sheridan - Part II (Kelon’s Story)

THE FIRST FYTTE

O’ wouldst thou remember dearest reader,
That yester day morn we had spun
A ballad of three wolven brethren,
Of which the tale of one t’were done
Read the rest of this entry »

“Running Wild” by Sarah McCarty

A ballad of three wolven brothers by Troubaudor Lola and Minstrel Sheridan - Part I (Donovan’s Story)

I

As it fell out on a winter’s day, many moons ago
The’er liv’d brethren three whose fearsome claws did show
That they were borne half wolf, half man, yet all heart
(Aye one was a cousin, but this ballad we must start)

Read the rest of this entry »

In search of the answer to the ultimate question “How Do I Snare Me A Hot Man?” Lola and Sheridan have traversed the globe for no place is too far, nor mountain too high for them or their band of merry Sherpas (on whose shoulders their LV trunks lay). Their unquenchable thirst for this knowledge has since led them to one of the highest mountain tops in the furthest regions of inner China, and to a man the locals know only as Shifu.

There, they found a man with a beard of flowing white, looking at them solemnly. “Look Sheridan, it’s Gandalf!” cried Lola in wonder. “Don’t be an idiot Lola,” hissed Sheridan. “It’s Dumbledore!”

Read the rest of this entry »

“Dangerous Secrets” by Lisa Marie Rice
In case you’ve missed me saying this the past 500 times, La Lola is generally not a fan of the romantic suspense novel. I usually skim the pages that talk about how Über Villain is laughing maniacally with his usual band of merry sidekicks about how he’s going to dangle the hero over a pit full of ravenous sharks.
Read the rest of this entry »

“Temperature’s Rising” by Karen Kelley
This week, Sheridan fell into a vat of love juice (gutter minds people! gutter minds!!) and found herself loving a book that would have otherwise easily fallen into the category of Books that Wish She Hadn’t Paid For As Monies Would Have Been Better Spent Buying Booze. It’s all about the priorities people. Though there were no epic scenes of heart-wrenchyness featuring such classic elements as The Longing, The Manly Clenching Of Jaw Followed By Silent Manly Tears, Grovel, nor passionate speeches in “Temperature’s Rising”, Sheridan found herself charmed nonetheless by the oddball cast of characters that were featured in the book. She may or may not have laughed at some point. Perhaps it is a sign of impending global warming, or a foreshadowing of the apocalypse, for nay did once irritation pass her mind, and the This Is Stupid bat lay untouched.

Read the rest of this entry »

“Sullivan’s Woman” by Nora Roberts
“Tell me again why I’m doing this,” whined Sheridan, perched on a bar stool.

“Don’t move Sheri!” barked Lola, sketching away furiously on a drawing pad. “I told you, I just finished “Sullivan’s Woman” by Nora Roberts and it featured an artist as the hero. So I’ve been moved by the artistic spirit!”
Read the rest of this entry »